Safari saga

Jun 27, 2024
Safari saga

It’s been chilly lately and as we mentioned two weeks ago, we’ve been making the most of the fire pit on these brisk Zimbabwean winter evenings. This week, on one of those evenings, just as the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a golden glow over the landscape - perfect for a cozy evening by the fire - our guests started sharing tales of their many adventures, as they always do when we gather around the fire pit.

One of our guests, let's call him John for dramatic effect, shared an unforgettable adventure from his visit to Nyamandlovu. It all started with a seasoned guide named Fortune, whose very name suggested he was born for these wild escapades. Fortune, a man with the patience of a saint and the nerves of a bomb squad, was about to take John and his group on a foot Safari in lion territory. Before setting off, he briefed the group with a simple rule: “Whatever you do, don’t run. I don’t want to use this rifle, so please, just follow the protocol.” Everyone nodded earnestly, probably imagining they were the next Indiana Jones.

As the group tiptoed through lion territory, trying to look as nonchalant as possible, they spotted the king of the jungle himself. The lion, lounging around like it had just finished a five-course meal, gave them a casual glance. Fortune, exuding calm, instructed the group to slowly back away.

But then, the lion decided it was time to play “scare the tourists.” It charged. Fortune stood firm, rifle raised, looking like a safari superhero. The lion stopped. The group, probably suppressing the urge to faint and doing their best impersonation of backing away coolly, started inching towards the vehicle.

Except, every time Fortune faced the lion, more and more tourists behind him were losing their nerve and bolting. The lion, seeing this bizarre game of peekaboo, kept charging, probably thinking, “This is the weirdest and slowest dinner I’ve ever seen.”

By the fourth charge, Fortune glanced back, expecting to see his group bravely retreating. Instead, he saw… NOBODY! They had all made a mad dash for the vehicle, leaving Fortune to wonder if he should start charging extra for bravery training. And it just dawned on him that this is probably why the lion was so persistent - it was simply amused by the human comedy act unfolding before it.

Realizing he was now the star of this one-man show, Fortune calmly backed away. The lion, perhaps a bit confused or simply tired of this odd encounter, predictably decided to call it quits and slinked back into the bush.

Back at the safety of the vehicle, the group shared awkward glances with Fortune, nervously laughed and exaggerated their tales of bravery… And there was Fortune, sitting right next to John as he recounted the lion encounter from two years back. With a grin, Fortune silently thanked his lucky stars he didn’t have to use his rifle that day and could right now enjoy another peaceful, if slightly chilly, evening under the Zimbabwean stars.

Friends, when you go on your next Safari here at Gwango, remember: stay calm, follow the protocol and for goodness’ sake, don’t run - Fortune’s sanity depends on it!



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